This morning, I woke up not with the sound of my alarm clock but with the sound of my own scream.
Yes, I screamed this morning. I freaked everybody in our house. My parents were so worried that I heard them asked our house help to wake me up so I wouldn’t fall asleep again.
I had a bad dream. I woke up hugging my pillow and after a couple of seconds, I cried. I could almost feel my heartbeat. My family members went to my room to ask if I was ok. My mother hugged me and asked me what had happened. I didn’t speak. I just looked at her. I was in a daze that even when I took a bath, I just leaned on the wall as the water from the shower came pouring. I could feel a little pain in my chest and a headache gave a sign of presence.
When I had my breakfast, my parents asked me to visit a doctor. “Ano bang nangyayari sa iyo? Ano bang ginawa mo kagabi? Baka naman kung anu-ano na kinakain mo” I still didn’t utter any word. I ate while staring at my plate. “Anak ano ba?!”, my father asked me. “Wala po. Hindi ko po alam”, was all I answered in a very low voice.
This afternoon, I read a book about interpreting dreams. Everything I saw, everything I did, everything that had happened has its own interpretation.
Bad trip. The universe is trying to tell me something. Bad trip. It was already blatant but I kept denying still. Bad trip. Why does it have to take a very freaky dream that can almost kill me screaming, just to make me admit to myself that that is really what’s happening.
I am not denying. I am scared. No. I am not scared. I’m confused. Such things shouldn’t exist. Such… they don’t have a place in my world. But why is there a seed? It isn’t fit to grow here. How come I didn’t see it before? How can somebody leave the seed without me noticing it? Bad trip talaga. Seed pa lang torturing na. Pano pa pag naging puno yan?.
What a bad dream. Even now that I’m awake, I still feel it’s all just a dream… and all I want is to wake up. This can’t be happening.
Yes, I screamed this morning. I freaked everybody in our house. My parents were so worried that I heard them asked our house help to wake me up so I wouldn’t fall asleep again.
I had a bad dream. I woke up hugging my pillow and after a couple of seconds, I cried. I could almost feel my heartbeat. My family members went to my room to ask if I was ok. My mother hugged me and asked me what had happened. I didn’t speak. I just looked at her. I was in a daze that even when I took a bath, I just leaned on the wall as the water from the shower came pouring. I could feel a little pain in my chest and a headache gave a sign of presence.
When I had my breakfast, my parents asked me to visit a doctor. “Ano bang nangyayari sa iyo? Ano bang ginawa mo kagabi? Baka naman kung anu-ano na kinakain mo” I still didn’t utter any word. I ate while staring at my plate. “Anak ano ba?!”, my father asked me. “Wala po. Hindi ko po alam”, was all I answered in a very low voice.
This afternoon, I read a book about interpreting dreams. Everything I saw, everything I did, everything that had happened has its own interpretation.
Bad trip. The universe is trying to tell me something. Bad trip. It was already blatant but I kept denying still. Bad trip. Why does it have to take a very freaky dream that can almost kill me screaming, just to make me admit to myself that that is really what’s happening.
I am not denying. I am scared. No. I am not scared. I’m confused. Such things shouldn’t exist. Such… they don’t have a place in my world. But why is there a seed? It isn’t fit to grow here. How come I didn’t see it before? How can somebody leave the seed without me noticing it? Bad trip talaga. Seed pa lang torturing na. Pano pa pag naging puno yan?.
What a bad dream. Even now that I’m awake, I still feel it’s all just a dream… and all I want is to wake up. This can’t be happening.
controlling an emotion or feeling is not good. teka, kelan ka pa naging ganyan? ;p
ReplyDeletetish