It Was Nice Meeting You...

"People who come to your life are like travelers. You might forget their scents, sounds of their voices, even their very faces, but their essences, that invisible, inscrutable part they leave behind, like spirit footsteps that forever echo in your heart"
I can still remember your lines when we first met, "Hi I'm Ian. And you are Cha, right? Kumakain ka ba ng isaw? Eh adidas?" I laughed. You smiled and said, "Just as I've thought. Tatawa ka. Every time I see you, lagi kang smiling. Masyado kang masayahin. Maganda yan."

You were exactly the way you described me—always happy. When I had the chance to get to know you more, I was amazed by how you view life in a remarkable panorama. I admire you so much because there had been times when things aren't well and I could not believe you still see it the way you always do.

When Kehl left for Norway, you saw how devastated I was. You always gave me a hug every time I was dreary for missing my bestfriend. "Hindi siya matutuwa pag nalaman niyang ganiyan ka" was your constant line. Months passed and I managed to go through with it, with your help and with other people's help. You habitually bomb my phone with your out-of-this-world jokes that can literally wake me up even at 3 A.M. At times that we're together and you see how quiet I am, you approach me and hug me without uttering any word. I don't know how you do it, but with that simple gesture I am able to pour out all the feelings I've been holding inside of me. And that was enough to make me feel better. You have a way of healing my pains. I asked you before why you haven't fallen in love again after your last girlfriend a year ago. You said "Hindi ako pwedeng magkaron ng gf kasi baka mabawasan yung time ko para sa barkada" and you would laugh and change the subject.

For the past couple of months you were frequently confined in the hospital. You always say it was because of low blood. It was last May that I learned you have leukemia…. and that you were dying. Those days were just actually an extension of your life. You never told us about it. You have always looked so ok that is why we never thought there was something wrong. You have always been our ever-positive guidance counselor.

Last Monday, you mom gave me a call saying that I have to go to the hospital. And so I did together with some of our friends. It scared me. When we reached the hospital, you talked to us one by one. When it was my turn, I wasn't able to hold my tears. And you asked why was I crying. I couldn't say that I had a bad feeling why your mom asked us to go to the hospital that night. And so I said "nothing". You asked me to sing that christian song we sang in duet at times that you play the keyboard and at times when life doesn't seem to go well. But I said no. "iiwan mo ko if I sing that song. Ian… manonood pa tayo ng spiderman diba? saka kakain pa tayo sa Crocrodile's Grill and kakain pa tayo ng ice cream. Bukas na lang ako kakanta kasi bukas we'll go out. Gusto mo ba akong mag-leave?" I begged you. "Cha please" you pleaded. And so I sang.

who can satisfy my soul like you
who could ever love me and comfort like you do
who could ever be more faithful true
who can satisfy
who can satisfy like you

there is a fountain who is a king
victorious warrior and Lord of everything
my rock my shelter, my very own
blessed redeemer
who reigns upon the throne

Tears fell on my eyes while I sang. And you asked, "Bakit ka umiiyak? Papangit voice mo". You wiped the tears in my eyes with your hands but I cried more. I was trying all efforts to say something more but you stopped me. "Wala ka nang dapat sabihin sa akin. Nasabi mo na lahat bago mo pa malaman ang sakit ko. For that I am happy. I am grateful because you have always proven what you told me… you love me. I could not ask for more. You are one of my angels here on earth. I love you my friend. Don't cry. Death ends life, not a relationship. And always remember that it is by faith that God's mighty power is released into the life of a Christian. Keep that faith you have in your heart.". Then I saw tears fell from your eyes.

After almost 30 minutes, you slept peacefully. After talking to your family, you decided that it was time for you to leave this place. Your mom gave me a letter before we left the hospital. She said you wrote it last week. I asked why you didn't give it when you were still alive so you could have heard my reply. She said, "He knows you would ask that. He wants to let you know that he doesn't need a reply" I read your letter when I arrived home. You were right. You don't need any reply because every feeling I have can't be put in words. I sometimes tried to control my tears. You once told me that I shouldn't cry because my friend Kehl who's in another country wouldn't like it and I know you would feel the same because all you wanted was for me to be happy. Thank you for everything. I will miss you.

I visited you tonight. I hope you heard me sang this song:

I need to talk with you again, why did you go away
All our time together, just feels like yesterday
I never thought I`d seen, a single day without you
The things we take for granted,we can sometimes lose.
And if I promise not to feel this pain, will I see you again, will I see you again.

Cos time will pass me by, may be I`ll never learn to smile
But i know I will make it through, if you wait for me. (won`t you wait for me.)
And all the tears I cry, no matter how I try.
They will never bring you home to me, won`t you wait for me in heaven.

Do you remember how it was, when we never seemed to care.
The days went by so quickly, cos I thought you`d always be there.
It`s hard to let you go, though I know that I must try.
I feel like I`ve been cheated, cos we never said goodbye.
And if I promise not to feel this pain, Will I see you again.
Cos I miss you so, and I need to know, Will you wait for me.

We both like that song, remember?